For most of my life I have sucked when it comes to following directions. Even during my time in a small town I still had a hard time.
Allow me to give you an example:
You’re having a party? Great! You’re giving me directions? I can do that.
Actually that was a lie. I can’t do that. Imagine telling me to turn left on Harlow and to take a right at the first stop sign. From there you tell me to drive straight until I see a brown house on the corner of Barney Street. I guarantee you I will find myself lost on the highest of mountain tops.
Trust me. It happened. Long story. We’re not going there.
I recognized my following direction issue early in life and realized quickly for survival purposes that the only way to deal with this nightmare was land marks.
Forget the street names and stop signs. Tell me to hang a right at Billy’s blue house with the rusted Chevy parked out front and quickly turn left at Sammy’s barn.
That I can do.
For the longest time I was use to all this. It was something I was bad at. Let’s face it, we can’t be good at everything. Imagine how boring that would be. Even super heroes fail at something.
But on the day I found myself lost in an IKEA kitchen display I begin to wonder. Do I have something that could actually be found in a medical dictionary?
I’m a person of repetition. After a hundred times on the same road I kind of have it down. Give me a week around the neighborhood and I start to get a good feel. But why can’t I be like most people?
One time. One shot. Perfection.
Of all the things I looked up this comes pretty close. Turn left when right is the obvious choice. A panic. A new place. How did I get here? No sense of east or west of anything else.
Maybe, just maybe this is why I get a little messed up.
I’m not sure what exactly to do with this new bit of info. On the other hand it’s nice to know I may have some company. There might be an entire town full of people just like me. All of us wondering how to get from point A to point B no matter how many times we’ve been there.
So if I every pay a visit to any of you keep in mind I have no problem renting a car once I reach your town. I have no problem driving to your home or favorite place to say hi. Just don’t expect to see for a while or ever again.
Oh, and one more thing: When it comes to a GPS. I’m pretty sure it has me figured out. It also has one sick sense of humor.
Happy Friday Everyone!!!!